October 27, 2012

On Christ the Solid Rock I Stand

"...all other ground is sinking sand." 

Friday was the first day that mommy didn't get a shower, brushed her teeth at 12:30, got to lunch around 3:30, and cried just as many times baby Santiago did. It was a day that, from the very beginning, I decided had to be given fully to God, because we were not going to get through it alone. There was necessary singing to calm down a sleepy baby, many made up exercise moves in not-so-perfect form took place in order to entertain Santi and help me keep my sanity, and there was slightly confusing cluster feeding - all. morning. long. Of course, though, he started off the day so full of joy! I had high hopes. Wouldn't you? Look at his cute little grins!

 It all started when Thursday ended, we all went to bed, Santiago ate a rich meal and followed it by a couple (two n a half) hours of lovely sleep. Then he woke, ate, I changed ye ol' diaper, and he ate a little more. This is a very normal routine, and he did it twice. Then pure madness happened: he kept falling asleep after his diaper changes, and didn't want to wake up for what I like to call his (mandatory) "round two". He always takes part, happily, in round two. It puts him to sleep for another few hours and he wakes ready for the other side. Yet, as I said, he just didn't care about round two - he cared about sleep. Bad choice, Santi.

You see, without round two, he wakes up after very short naps crying out for more milk. We fall asleep after said diaper change and are both awaken after less than 30 minutes. This continued all night and morning long. So you can imagine than, by around 9:30am, we are both exhausted and in need of a nap or three. That was all I could think about. I decided at that very moment that I would be taking a rich nap each time Santiago went down after a meal.

Onto: coconut water, 2 bananas, an apple, walnuts, oranges and some kiwi. Then more breastfeeding, and baby's first AM nap. I let him sleep on me for a bit, until he was really lost in a deep sleep, then I transferred him to his pack and play next to our bed. Turn on sleep sheep (white sound toy), grab my pillows, and rest head ever so quietly so I don't wake sleeping peanut. Honestly I think this guy here's me pull the sheets over my head - instantly, within two minutes, he is awake and crying.

We rock, we dance, we check his diaper - all fails, he is looking for some action with the milk makers, he is hungry. I am exhausted. I feed him in bed with the hopes of some post-meal shut eye. Hope soon all gone- this is where more praying takes place. "I cannot get through this day without full dependance on You, Lord, and the strength that You provide me with."

More short feedings, more two second naps, more fussy baby, more dancing, singing, reading, eating fruit while rocking, more attempts to distract him from his tiredness, more attempts at putting him to sleep and failing. Le sigh. I googled 6 week old constantly eating and am re-assured by two things: very likely a growth spurt (cluster feeding round the clock every 30 minutes), and baby is not overeating, since most babies under 2 years old do not overeat, especially if they are exclusively breastfeeding.

So I accepted the day for what it was. He was generally happy, as long as I listened for them hunger cues, and he did have many moments of fun play. But I was completely drained, unbathed (least of my problems) and very hungry. I turned on a movie downstairs while I nursed Santi and planned on cooking myself some food once he fell asleep. Soon enough, asleep he was, but as I placed him in his Rock n' Play (which he normally loves sleeping in) he woke - screaming. I almost cried my eyes out. This can't be happening! It was, though, it was happening and I had to say another prayer and get through it.

My (and Santi's) best friend at that moment, whether he approved or not, was the Moby wrap. I whipped it out of the closet, spoke to a crying Santiago as calm as I could while I wrapped the giant piece of fabric around my waist, over my shoulders and round n round some more. I hugged him inside snug and firm - he fought me so I walked around the house patting him and "shh, shhh, shhhh"-ing until he dozed off. Once he was asleep, he didn't budge. Deep, profound, awaited dream land greeted him gently.

He stayed asleep for almost 3 hours. I diced up some sweet potato and coated it in coconut oil, rosemary, garlic, salt and pepper and baked it for 20 minutes (see Edible Perspective's website for the complete recipe!). Then I chopped up some baby carrots and broccoli and coated them in the same seasonings. Fruit was already diced and ready for the blender, kale already washed and de-stemmed, just needed a banana added and some water for my smoothie. Inhaled.

Also down into my hungry belly went: shredded cabbage (red and green) with apple, raisin, apple cider vinegar, olive oil, salt pepper and agave. My sister arrived to hang out with Santi, and we chatted as I pulled the sweet taters out of the oven and added the broccoli with carrots (bake another 20 mins). Beans and chili powder into microwave, avocado on top, and the roasted broccoli n sweet potato cubes were joyfully consumed.

Praise the Great Lord for days like this one. A day fully focused on Him, a challenging day with baby, a gift as I'm reminded that Christ is the Rock of my life and He is always with me. My eyes were opened to what an amazing blessing it is to have family so close and so loving. I cannot imagine these first months of his life without the support of my family, it is such a breath of fresh air to speak to adults during the day, too! Since Edu takes our only car to work, we don't get out much. We had been walking daily in our neighborhood, but with baby's odd feeding and nap schedule, I have been hesitant to leave the house. So being with family has been so beautiful!

Santiago ate happily and napped throughout the rest of the day but got a little fussy once my sister and parents left (they came over after their work days to see the little monkey - new grandparents daily tradition!). Then papi arrived home from a one-day business trip and life was good again. Edu swayed Santi to sleep like a pro and we peacefully rested. What a day! So thankful it happened because of all baby and I both learned from it, and I'm praying that we get a little break before the next growth spurt day comes along.

the (sleepy) end.

The LORD is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer; my God is my rock, in whom I take refuge. He is my shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold. Psalm 18:2

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